Sparkle envy
A package arrived at work last week from my brother-in-law Jeff containing a little something special for each of the ladies in our office. Fancy cowgirl belts.
Tammy, Wendy and me all shiny and sparkly.
What's that? Need a closer look? Of course, I understand. I can't stop looking at it either.
Fancy Western Belt Q&A
Q: Do you have to live in a Western state to have one of those belts?
A: Apparently not, but you do have to be able tocoerce sweet talk your brother-in-law into getting one for you and the other ladies at the office.
Q: Jennie, are you a cowgirl or have any cowgirl experience?
A: No, but I did ride a horse in Texas once guided by a real life cowboy named James. Marty was also with me on that trip and he wore shorts and tennis shoes for our ride and almost got bucked off by his horse. He hates horses now, so I'll probably never get to be a real cowgirl. I have, however, read Even Cowgirls Get the Blues, Dear Calamity, Love Belle, and Cowboys are My Weakness.
Q: Do Tammy or Wendy have any cowgirl experience?
A: I don't believe so, although Tammy was a Dairy Princess so she does have practical cow experience.
Q: Where do you wear a belt like that?
A: Wherever you want and you wear it with sass.
Q: What do you wear with a belt like that?
A: Jeans with belt loops are the only requirement. Based on my first experience wearing the belt, Depends may be needed because I almost wet my pants during the ten minutes it took me to get that big belt end out of the loop.
Q: When are you going to wear a belt like that?
A: I'm going to wear mine whenever I feel like it. Tammy is going to wear hers when she shows her cows and when she plays hostess at her next barn dance. Wendy says she's going to wear hers after the baby is born and wears pants that have belt loops again.
Q: That belt looks heavy. What's it weigh?
A: Probably five pounds, it's seriously loaded down with silver and sparkle. [Actual weight: 1 pound]
Q: I suppose you'll need some new boots to go with that belt now, huh?
A: Don't be silly, already have black cowboy boots. I have a hat too. But I might need a new diamond necklace. You know, to balance out all that sparkle around my waist.
Tammy, Wendy and me all shiny and sparkly.
What's that? Need a closer look? Of course, I understand. I can't stop looking at it either.
Fancy Western Belt Q&A
Q: Do you have to live in a Western state to have one of those belts?
A: Apparently not, but you do have to be able to
Q: Jennie, are you a cowgirl or have any cowgirl experience?
A: No, but I did ride a horse in Texas once guided by a real life cowboy named James. Marty was also with me on that trip and he wore shorts and tennis shoes for our ride and almost got bucked off by his horse. He hates horses now, so I'll probably never get to be a real cowgirl. I have, however, read Even Cowgirls Get the Blues, Dear Calamity, Love Belle, and Cowboys are My Weakness.
Q: Do Tammy or Wendy have any cowgirl experience?
A: I don't believe so, although Tammy was a Dairy Princess so she does have practical cow experience.
Q: Where do you wear a belt like that?
A: Wherever you want and you wear it with sass.
Q: What do you wear with a belt like that?
A: Jeans with belt loops are the only requirement. Based on my first experience wearing the belt, Depends may be needed because I almost wet my pants during the ten minutes it took me to get that big belt end out of the loop.
Q: When are you going to wear a belt like that?
A: I'm going to wear mine whenever I feel like it. Tammy is going to wear hers when she shows her cows and when she plays hostess at her next barn dance. Wendy says she's going to wear hers after the baby is born and wears pants that have belt loops again.
Q: That belt looks heavy. What's it weigh?
A: Probably five pounds, it's seriously loaded down with silver and sparkle. [Actual weight: 1 pound]
Q: I suppose you'll need some new boots to go with that belt now, huh?
A: Don't be silly, already have black cowboy boots. I have a hat too. But I might need a new diamond necklace. You know, to balance out all that sparkle around my waist.
Pam Houston is so fabulous... my copy of Cowboys Are My Weakness is dog-eared and full of little notes in the margins... it's been about 13 years since I last read it... I am almost afraid to see where my mind was at... you know, reading about all those cowboys!
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Forgot to add that I am loving the belts and thanks for the FAQ belt questions... now I am in the know ;-p
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This article is HYsterical! You look beautiful - after I was able to pull my eyes off of your belt! I was in to check on Marty's progress and of course this article caught my eye. Happy New Year!
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